Count down to September is here. You've been feeling anxious all summer.
That evil real estate agent made it possible for your parents to move you away from friends, away from that boy or girl you like, away from all that’s familiar. And even if you're popular. It can be really scary.
You wonder about what the new school going to be like? Will the kids like you? Will you fit in?
Will the teachers be nice?
I know the thoughts going through your head right are making your stomach turn over and your palms sweat, maybe you are considering dropping out or joining Cirque de Soleil or even worse, becoming a musician and touring the country on a bus....STOP THE INSANITY NOW....okay, breathe.
YOU, you can do this and you are going go be okay.
And let's face it, even if you avoid the first day, the next day will still be your first day. Going late will only make you more visible and obviously new. Let's go through some tips now. Later you can channel your "inner" Alanis Morisette and write a song about that *evil* real estate agent who probably is not even thinking about you right now....or is she???
Here are some tips that just might help you ease into your new school. : ) : ) : )
•Remember that the new place will give you a new chance. For at least the first day, you’re exotic (but not in that mean girl kind of way!)
Especially in a school where there isn’t much coming and going, you’re someone special. Yes, it’s true you left what is familiar. But the new place is also a new opportunity. Nobody knows who you are, who you hung out with, or what to expect from you. If you didn’t quite like who you are or the reputation you had, you have a chance to start over. If you did like it, you can take that confidence with you and make a big splash.
•Get oriented. If at all possible, visit the school before school starts. It’s hard enough to start over without also getting lost all the time. Check out where the principal’s office is and how to get to the library. If you don't have time for this, that is okay, asking for directions is one way to get to know people and it is how I met my husband, Ryan Gosling...okay, I just made that up but you get my point.
•Do a little research. Get on the Internet and find out about the school. There’s probably a website. You can find out about sports teams and events. You can learn what clubs are active and how the teams are doing.
• Don't be too eager. When you’re lonely, it’s tempting to grab onto whoever grabs you. But you want to take the time to get to know people and figure out who’s who.
• Wardrobe. For most teens, clothes are code for who you are. Wear a clean, neat, but kind of neutral outfit the first day. Get up in time to shower and do your hair. Jeans are generally fine as long as they’re clean and not flashy. Presenting yourself neutrally the first few days gives you time to figure out the informal rules for dress among the students. Once you’ve got it down, you can dress to fit in with the group you want to accept you.
•Avoid cafeteria stress the first day. Pack a lunch so you don’t have to stand in line wondering whether to accept someone’s invitation to join their table. Confidently sit on the edge and watch for a few days. Sit in a way that broadcasts confidence. You’re not a reject. You’re taking the time to think about who you’ll choose to be with.
•Introduce yourself to teachers. First impressions matter so be polite.
• Get involved. There’s no better way to meet your new best friends and have lots of fun than to try out for your new school’s basketball team, audition for theater club or join the math-letes.
•Take charge. Once you’ve got an idea who you want to meet, it’s up to you. Remember – people like to talk about themselves. Think of a couple of questions you can ask each person and the conversation will take off almost by itself. Express your opinions. Most of your new classmates will be curious about you and will want to get to know you. Don’t be afraid to express your opinions. Let them know about your favorite movies, books or videogames. Speak up in class and be as confident as you can be without being cocky.
•Keep your old friends. Skype and Facebook and Twitter and texting and email and even the phone can let you stay in touch with old friends. That’s all good. But it can also be quicksand. If you let yourself spend hours and hours communicating with old friends, you’ll make it less likely that you’ll find new ones. By staying so connected to people who live hours away, you might keep yourself lonely in your own backyard.
As tempting as it is to hang on tight to what is familiar, give yourself – and your new community – a fair chance. Spend afterschool time involved with the new. Allow an hour at night for reunions as a reward for getting your assignments done. As hard as it is, this also applies to boyfriends or girlfriends left behind. Give each other permission to see other people and to be fully involved in your own schools. If your romance was meant to be, you’ll reconnect in the future.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Adjusting to a new school and making new friends are hard things to do, so don’t beat yourself up about it. Know that you’re awesome.
Be open. You’re probably missing your friends from your old school right now, but make sure to give your new classmates a chance. Get to know people by inviting them to do things after school. Be a good listener. Always be kinder than is necessary.
Have an awesome year!
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Believe!
